MCO phase 3 (15-28 April 2020)

Yes, it's now MCO phase 3! I could not believe how time passes so fast, and I could not believed I've been lock down at HOME for more than a month.

      It's been great working at home, but not so great when your laptop is dead and sharing laptop instead. It's not really convenient working at home, with no proper desk and makes us very sluggish and not productive.

     Good thing that I've picked up some basic cooking skills, just few types of soups and fry vegetable. Working out almost every night plus one cheat day (to comfort myself but end up feeling guilty!).
My depression attacked me while I'm having my menstruation, making me lack of confident and making me feel like I'm wasting my time everyday at home.
I'm trying to think of some ideas to occupy my time but it just doesn't work, which makes me even more disappointed.

    We as a travel agency have been affected badly including the tourism. No one can travel, few countries has been locked down, flight is not operating, etc... Business is getting very bad and people are getting anxious. SARS happened more than 10 years ago, but COVID19 is the worst. Million people died and the numbers are increasing. Malaysia is affected because of the group of people who are stubborn and passes the disease everywhere!
Fortunately, I'm working in a very well organised and stable Travel company, which provides very good benefits to staffs.

   One thing that affect me the most, is the online training/webinars that is been giving to us NONSTOP, and expecting us to finish it in such short time. It's good to pick up some knowledge to brush up skills during pandemic times, but one after another with deadlines - this is forced learning. When it comes to forced learning, it becomes a burden. While operators is handling customers, while we have to study other regulations, while we need to brainstorm for upcoming agendas, these e-learning is making me stressed out. Not one, not two, but total of around 60-70 modules +  webinars with deadline. To be frank, non of this knowledge goes into my mind, except for ticketing training which requires more focus and practices.
Customer is chasing for refunds, cancellation, changes, rules changes everyday. Bosses is asking for sales, updates, ideas, meetings. So our pay is getting cut by this month, income is lesser and burden gets heavier.

    Depression attacked me bad yesterday, and I locked myself and cried in the room for 2 times. Because I don't understand what am I doing everyday except pleasing everybody. It felt better afterwards and ended up working out for 2 hours.
It come back again when I started my work, where messages is coming in non-stop, and traumatise when phone is ringing. I have no interest in anything and I don't feel motivated at all.

   I'm sure that I am one of those who suffered from this because they are at home too long.
If happens that anyone is reading this blog and going thru the same thing, I hope that we can go thru  this together. Many noises in my head and it really drives me crazy sometime.